


Trial and Error

by Pink Panda (Ejacyeolation)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Couch Sex, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Phone Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sexual Humor, Sexuality Crisis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-08
Updated: 2014-08-02
Packaged: 2018-01-23 23:32:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1583420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ejacyeolation/pseuds/Pink%20Panda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren thinks he's in love with Levi, but the older male dismisses it as "teenage hormones". Things go down hill and then up again from there. Basically PWP set in an AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Levi," I called from my place on the beanbag. I was playing Flappy Bird on my phone and cursed loudly when the bird hit his stupid, giant beak again on the Mario pipe thingy. What an idiot.

"What?" I heard Levi answer, voice sounding weird.

I looked up from my phone to see that Levi was facing away from me, cheek pressed against his pillows. "Nothing," I replied, combing a hand through my hair before tapping the screen to play again.

"Idiot," was the retort.

After dying for six straight rounds, and scores ranging from one to four, I called him again.

"What?" This time, Rivaille slightly turned to look at me. "If you're hungry, I have some kiwis in my fridge, but I'm not getting them for you."

I just looked at him but didn't answer. After a few awkward seconds of just looking at each other, I dropped my gaze to play with the phone again. Levi groaned.

"Levi?"

"Jesus fucking Christ, what is it?" The raven-haired man snapped, just looking over his shoulder at me.

"I think I might be in love with you," I murmured. There was no point in beating around the bush now, with Levi sounding irritated. He could easily beat up my ass, in ways that I didn't exactly find appealing.

Rivaille rolled onto his side so he was properly looking at me, face betraying a mix of mild shock and confusion. "What?"

"I think I might be in love," I repeated, tucking my phone away to have something to do with my hands instead of just fidgeting around with them.

"With me." It sounded more like a statement than a question.

"With you," I agreed, nodding a few times, more to myself than to him.

After a good one to two minutes of just staring at me, probably analyzing just want the heck I was up to, he finally said, "Eren, you're straight."

Well, didn't that just sound like such a dumb thing for Levi to say, considering that Levi's pretty smart and he rarely says things even remotely close to dumb. He always sounded sure, and… well, smart, and now he just sounded dumb with all the repeating and stating of the obvious. Maybe he was doing marijuana behind my back.

"Yeah, I thought I was. Maybe I really was, but maybe not anymore?" I suggested, expecting Levi to pick out an answer from that, and maybe explain just what was going on because he was the genius here. I tried to think back, to try and figure out or remember the exact time when my hormones just decided to go on gay alert, and inadvertently thought back to the faithful day…

The faithful day of April first, the day that Levi made a joke about his height and the day that I got my heart broken. Not for the first time, but it was still a heartbreak, nonetheless.

"Jeager, please, just spare me the pranks. I already have the biggest practical joke of all time; my height," Levi had said upon opening the door to our shared apartment, in his usual monotone.

It had shocked me then because one, Levi never acknowledges that fact the he might just be a bit (okay, maybe not just a bit) vertically challenged and two, he never tolerates height jokes around him, let alone makes one himself. I could had only imagined how much forcing he'd had to do with his inner self to execute that joke, and maybe even had went as far as to prepare some handy tissue rolls for when the waterworks erupt.

Although very much honored that Levi had done such a huge thing (involving his very small height) in a vain attempt at trying to make me laugh, I'd still felt like it would have been better if the others had been there to serve as a larger audience, because that joke would've had made them laugh so hard that they'd cry.

I had been sure of this because, after staring at Levi like he'd had grown an extra head with a few more extra things, I'd burst into a laughing fit, which had eventually turned into a not-so-manly hysterical crying episode, because I'd thought I had every right to cry, thinking that I had just received the biggest practical joke of my life: Annie breaking up with me on April Fool's, which of course the very intellectual me had interpreted as an April Fool's joke, and me finding out that Annie was actually pretty serious, as serious as Levi when he takes a shit (not that I would know about that, but still).

And there couldn't have possibly been anything worse than that, right? Oh, just throw in my sister into the equation, the apparent reason as to why Annie'd figured out that she wasn't the straightest straw in the broom.

And because I'd had a perfectly legit reason to, I had taken the opportunity to pathetically cry on Levi's shoulder, despite it being a bit difficult because of the height gap that I didn't dare complain about, and he'd ushered me to his room. I had heard him wince a few times then, clearly dreading the mess of snot mixed with tears that would surely stick to his shirt. That might have egged me on to cry a bit harder.

"Do you even understand me?" I had demanded in between attempts to force some air into my lungs. "I was pranked, but I wasn't. I was laughing," deep breath, "because I thought it was actually a good prank, you know? So how should I feel after finding out that I was laughing at myself,  _after getting dumped_?"

Rivaille had shoved a handful of tissue in my face, particularly the nose area, which meant that he'd been disgusted by how I had looked. "Listen, brat. If you think that that's the biggest April Fool's practical joke of all time, then I would like to kindly remind you of my parents, who got me as God's very own practical joke on them. How awesomely tragic is that?"

The funny thing about that was the fact Rivaille's the atheist of the atheists, and that'd had me laughing a bit.

The not so funny part about that was the fact that both Levi's parents were dead, and I'd just had to remind him of that.

"Maybe that was his way of saying sorry," he'd said, shrugging.

"You're going to hell for that." Cue for some gross nose-blowing that cut off Levi's blasphemous attempts at humor.

My head snapped up when my brain registered that my name was being called in real time, and looked over to see Levi looking at me with a bored and slightly annoyed expression, before getting up into a sitting position on his bed, slightly leaning against the pillows he stacked up behind him.

"Come here," he told me, beckoning me with his hand. I felt my muscles tense a bit, but got up walked away from the comfort of the borrowed beanbag, walking the small distance to stand by his bed and lean down a little towards him. The hand that was gesturing for me earlier now clamped down on the back of my neck, pulling me down to meet lips with him.

It lasted for one second. Two. Three. Then it was over.

He pulled back and looked at me, analyzing again. "How did you feel about that?"

I blinked once. Twice. Thrice. I felt my face slightly heat up and I told him how I honestly felt, because if honesty really is the best policy, then now would be the perfect time to practice it.

"More," I breathed out.

I leaned in for another kiss, followed by another, and another, and would have dived in for more if I didn't feel hands on my shoulders, keeping me in place. I opened my eyes and braced myself for whatever might come next.

"You're an idiot."

Well, that went better than expected.

And Levi's obviously not trying to push me away.

So why not straddle and sit on him?  _Oops, I slipped on nothing, silly me. But isn't this quite comfortable_? Pair that with a wink and you get a slutty Eren Jaeger at your service.

I studied his face, still sporting its usual mask of composure, but the slight bob of his adam's apple as he swallowed gave me hope that this wasn't entirely a lost cause.

 _If you can break a bone, you can certainly bend some straight out of him_ , the little devil inside my head told me.

 _Leave him the fuck alone, Jaeger, you don't fuck friends_ , the angel reminded me.

 _You don't fuck friends_. Yeah, that certainly was a rule.  _Especially not your best friend_.

Well, you're also not supposed to kiss them.

I shook my head, willing the crazy things to go away, which earned me a raised eyebrow from Levi.

"I'm sorry," I said, not liking how my voice dropped to a near whisper. I didn't know if I was sorry for kissing him, or for suddenly shaking my head, or just sorry for everything in general, like the national debt.

Levi didn't remove his hands, his expression unreadable. "You didn't answer the question."

"Is it important?" Not like you're not going to kick my ass out any time soon.

Levi rolled his eyes at me, letting go of my shoulders and scooting over to give me some room to sit on the edge of his bed.

"Well, it's surprisingly not that much different from kissing a girl."

"So you liked it because it wasn't much different from kissing a girl," Levi deadpanned.

"No! I liked it. I just liked it, not because of that," I disagreed, frowning at him.

"Then because of what? Because you think you like me? Because you think you can get a boner from making out with me?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest. I couldn't answer because I really wasn't sure of things yet, except maybe for that one by the end.

Levi sighed, raking his bangs back with his hand. "You don't know if you're gay, Eren. Maybe it's just some sort of post-break up thing, and your hormones are just messing with you."

"Are you fucking kidding me? The break up happened six months ago, and I'm only now experiencing this? Stop doing drugs, Levi."

"Oh, so I'm the one doing drugs? Who the fuck just suddenly announces that they might be in love with me? Maybe you got it wrong, Eren. Maybe you just want to fuck me?"

Holy shit. He did not just say that. "Did you just call my love a fraud?"

"No, I just called you a teenager with raging hormones, who can't find a hole to put his dick in, so he preys on the next best thing there is to a vagina: an asshole."

I stood up, glaring at him. "Yeah, you are an asshole. And fuck you."

"Oh, I know you want to."

* * *

"Eren, can you just go home now?"

"Home is where Rivaille is," I answered grumpily.

"Obviously, your home isn't where Armin just wants to study in peace, without Eren being a twat and making all these whining noises," Armin said, sarcasm dripping out from every word.

"Jesus christ, Armin. You don't have to kick me out."

"Did Levi kick you out?" he finally asked.

"Fuck no! I removed myself, thank you very much." I huffed, feeling indignant.

Armin slapped a hand to his face, sitting down beside me on his couch. "Fine. Tell me what happened."

So I went and told him everything that happened that afternoon, complete with gestures and such.

"Maybe he has a reason to think that way," Armin chided.

"Absolutely not. I went and told him that I might be in love with him, and he dismisses it as teenage hormones?"

"Have you been looking at his ass lately?" he asked.

"What? No!"

"Have you accidentally walked in on him while he was showering?"

"No, Armin."

"Have you been jacking off to him—."

"Armin,  _please_. I wasn't even thinking about anything sexual until  _he_  brought it up," I insisted, and it was the truth.

"He has every right to doubt you, Eren. We've known you for years, and we've known you as a straight male. You can't just suddenly tell him, the guy you used as a shoulder to cry on when your last straight relationship failed, that you're in love with him and expect him to believe just that."

"I said I  _might_  be in love with him," I tried, but I knew it was a weak defense.

"All the more reason to doubt you and your ulterior motives," Armin told me earnestly.

"Okay fine, I wasn't a raging homosexual before. Can't anybody just sit and think that maybe, just maybe, I just hadn't met a guy whom I felt my heart go doki doki for? Seriously? Just because I've only ever dated girls, it automatically means that I'm absolutely straight?"

Armin looked at me for a long time after my little outburst, mulling over my words.

"That… actually makes sense," he allowed.

"Why, thank you. That makes me so happy," I answered, not intending to be sarcastic but still coming off that way. "And while I'm at it, can I just point out that he kissed me first, despite knowing that I have some sort of yet-to-be defined romantic sentiment for him? That's like giving a druggie some good and expensive junk, letting him have a taste, and just leaving it there at arm's reach, totally available for the druggie to use. Would anyone refuse that sort of opportunity laid out in front of them? No, hence why I kissed him back."

"Your point being…?

"Why the fuck did he have to kiss me, if he's gonna act all snobbish and  _Eren you're just horny_  after it?"

Armin shrugged. "Maybe he's not really as opposed to dating you as he's letting on? It is unfair for him if you just use him to find out which team you really want to bat in, and maybe he just doesn't want that sort of thing to happen to him."

"It's not like I'm going to use him as a test-fuck. As far as I know, he's a lot straighter than me, so maybe it'll be the other way around." I looked at Armin and realized that he was taking this all too lightly. "I'm surprised that you don't seem to be surprised at all."

Armin snorted. "The only thing I'm surprised about is that you're surprised that Levi would react that way."

"Don't even dare tell Mikasa yet, if you still want both me and Levi alive for the next few weeks."

* * *

I returned to the apartment that day feeling a bit less angrier with Levi. He came out from his room after a couple of minutes passed since I first called him.

"We need to talk."

"Do we?" He plopped down on the couch, draping his arm on its backrest.

"First, I am not just after your body."

He raised an eyebrow at this, eyes boring into mine.

"It is not an immediate desire," I explained, praising myself for my wonderful way of phrasing it.

"Isn't that comforting to know," He deadpanned, sounding the least bit impressed.

I groaned and sat down on the couch as well, near enough for a quick maneuver to pin him down (if he doesn't punch me straight in the face), but far enough to keep from invading his personal space.

I looked over to him, and said, "We should try it out."

He sighed, like I just uttered exactly what he was waiting for. "No, Eren, I will not be used to—."

"No, no. Let's try it out for you," I said, cutting him off.

This took him slightly by surprise. "Excuse me?"

"I want us to try it out so you'll know if you're comfortable with a guy," I explained, slowly bringing my hands up in defense.

Levi scoffed. "Right, Eren. Turn it around so I'll be the one to you use  _you_  as a test fuck. That's right."

"No, I swear I already know I'm okay with doing it with a guy—," I tried to assure him, but he was having none of it.

"You're okay with fucking a guy, Eren. Are you okay with being butt fucked by a guy?"

I gulped down nothing. "I'm okay with the idea of being fucked by you, Levi." After this statement left my mouth, I immediately felt my face burning up, but I forced myself not to break the eye contact.

Silence settled between us, and I was afraid that I might have royally fucked it up this time. I watched as Levi looked away and my heart sank, until I observed him closer. The tenseness of his shoulders faded away and his face looked slightly open.

"Levi…" I called, hesitantly closing the distance between us. "Look at me."

He reluctantly turned his head back, and I was more than shocked to see that there were no traces of his earlier resentment and annoyance with me on his face. He just looked cautious and doubting.

"Levi. Please, at least let's give it a try. I know I'm risking a lot of things here, but please…" As I said this, I ever so slowly started pushing him back until he was on his back on the couch, looking up at me.

When Levi didn't try to push me off, I knew I had to act and I had to act fast. I gingerly took his face in my hands and claimed his lips again. This time, I was able to concentrate on the actual feel of them; soft and slightly cold. I kept kissing him, each kiss outlasting the one before it. Soon, it was a mess of tongue and teeth biting on lips, mostly from my part.

Levi was still playing the passive role, kissing back but not being aggressive. I moaned into his mouth and felt him kiss back with a little more force. Still, he was being 'neutral', which meant that whatever happened, I would be the one held responsible and it would all be my fault.

So be it.

I broke away from his mouth to trail kisses down to his throat. I licked at the exposed skin and felt him shudder.

"Don't bite and don't leave any marks," Levi warned.

_Damn it, that was what I was planning to do._

My hands travelled down, past his shoulders, and started rubbing on his sides. I let a hand slip under the crisp shirt he was wearing, running my hand along the perfect planes of his stomach. Using my other hand, I slowly started unbuttoning his shirt. When I was done with this task, I pulled back and flung his shirt open, revealing his bare chest.

There were two things that went through my mind in that moment;  _holy fucking shit what a hottie_  and  _holy fucking shit we're both hard_. I realized the latter because my erection was pressed into his, and I bit my lip, not being able to stop myself from grinding down on him.

The first hump felt heavenly and I ended up repeating it again and again in a slow and steady pace, rubbing our clothed erections together. I saw Levi lick his lips and I stopped my ministrations to get up a bit to open my fly and pull down my pants. I discarded them on the floor and soon, Levi's followed.

I leaned back, sitting on his strong thighs, and continued the deed of dry humping him. I saw that pink tongue dart out again to wet his lips and I knew, from that and from how hard he was now, that he was enjoying this.

"Levi, Levi, Levi," I chanted out, making him groan. I started feeling the strain on my legs and slowed down a bit.

Levi growled underneath me, grabbing my ass and promptly shoving me back and forth on his clothed dick. I gasped and a moan escaped my lips. Levi would pull me in far enough that his member would slide between the crack in my ass.

He pushed me back and our positions were reversed, with him leaning over me and me staring up at him. His eyes were clouded with lust and I would have smirked if I wasn't so turned on.

Levi roughly pulled off my boxers and tossed them on the floor. He parted my legs and slid in between them, taking my now fully exposed hard on in his hands and smearing the precum from the tip to the shaft. I didn't have enough time to bite down a loud moan as his mouth engulfed me.

He looked up at me as I felt his tongue swirl around the swollen head of my cock, his eyes willing me to stare back. I grabbed his hair, urging him to take in more. He obliged and soon, he was bobbing his head up and down, holding down my hips to prevent me from bucking into his mouth.

With a loud pop, he pulled back and started rummaging through a drawer. I felt my heart skip a beat at the sight of the lube and condom in his hand.

I silently watched as he coated a finger with lube before it was being pressed against my entrance. "This might feel uncomfortable, but you'll feel good soon enough," he said, before the finger was pushed up my ass, past the tight ring of protective muscle, and I held back a whimper.

"Shh," he soothed, pulling back his finger only to push back in and bury it deeper. This went on until I felt his knuckle bump against my ass cheeks. I didn't notice him lubing up a second finger until he pulled back the first digit and when it came back in, it doubled in size. I yelped and he used his free hand to stroke and pump my now only semi-hard cock again.

He was thrusting his finger back and forth and I didn't know where to concentrate. One moment I was moaning from the attention my length was receiving, the next thing I knew I was throwing my head back because, "Fuck, what was that?"

"Found the spot," Levi simply said and I heard a smirk in his voice. He kept hitting that spot and I was going completely hard again, even harder than before. I didn't even notice that there were three fingers inside me because it just felt so good.

"Levi," I gasped out. "Stop. I'm ready. I want you now."

He fucked me with his fingers a few more times before he pulled them out. I whined, but he was already dumping his boxers down and jesus fucking christ.

"Levi I don't think you're going to fit," I told him, staring at his cock as he ripped the condom open and rolled it on. Forget his height, Levi was huge.

"Thank you, Eren. I needed that boost to my ego."

He was taking it as a compliment but I was generally concerned for my well being. It must have shown on my face because he was sighing, pulling my chin up so I looked at his face.

"You'll be fine," he assured me, giving my lips an open mouthed kiss.

He pulled back and poured lube over his dick and I gulped down nothing again.  _It's okay, I can take that in_. He parted my legs further and he was positioning himself by the entrance.

The head slowly went in and I knew that no, I can't take that it.

I screwed my mouth and my eyes shut as he inched forward until he was all the way in. "Eren, are you okay?"

I opened my eyes to look at him. "You're too fucking big, you idiot."

A grin broke across his face and he hummed, lifting my legs up and holding on to them. He didn't give me much of a warning as he pulled back and slammed himself all the way in.

I was lost in the feelings of both pain and pleasure, not used to being stretched so much but he kept hitting that damn thing inside me and I was moaning and panting under him.

His pace turned torturously slow as I started enjoying it more and I glared at him. "Stop… being a tease, fuck…"

He kept his thrusts slow and shallow, watching me with his hazy eyes. "Beg for it, Eren."

I clamped my mouth shut, and then he stilled. "Fuck, Levi! Fuck me faster and harder, please!"

He grinned before saying, "My pleasure." The hands that were holding my thighs gripped harder and I knew it was going to leave bruises there. He rutted into me faster, hitting the sensitive bundle of nerves inside me harder.

I was a moaning mess, panting like crazy and dragging blunt fingers down his back. It took a few more thrusts and I felt something tighten in my stomach, the telltale sign that I was going to lose it real soon now.

I pulled him down and kissed him on the mouth, our tongues fighting for dominance and then he pulled back and he was sucking on my neck and one of his hands managed to slip down and was pumping my cock in time with his thrusts and I couldn't take it anymore and came, screaming out his name as my orgasm shook my body. It took him a few more thrusts and he came as well, my own name leaving his lips as he rode out his release.

He pulled out and removed the condom, tying it up before letting it fall on the floor. Levi collapsed on top of me, and we lay there, feeling completely spent. I felt him nuzzling his head into my shirt and his hands clinging to me.

My mind was still foggy from the afterglow of the amazing orgasm I just had, one that wasn't brought upon by my own hands. Nothing seemed clear at first, but as I gradually came down from the high that the orgasm induced, I became painfully aware of three things.

First, Levi wasn't as straight as he seemed to be. Second, there was a part of him -and I didn't know how big or strong that part was or how long it would last- that became all cuddly and sweet after sex. And third, I was unmistakably and majestically gay (for him, at least).

* * *

"You tricked me, didn't you?" I accused, once we were cleaned up and I was seated on the couch, my back sore as hell. "You knew you were…"

"When did I ever say that I was straight?" he asked. His face was carefully blank but there was a twinkle in his eyes.

I groaned, dropping my face into my palms. "At least tell me that we're dating now, not just one-time fuck buddies or something."

He leaned in, his breath hot on my ear, and patted my sore back. He whispered, "Round two when you're ready, love."

* * *

A week after the incident, I got the call from Mikasa, and I made the mistake of asking Levi to put it on speaker because I was too busy playing Battle in Megaville.

"Eren," her voice came out from my phone. "I'm disappointed that I had to find out from Armin about your newly discovered sexuality and the reason why you discovered it in the first place."

My jaw dropped, and I was vaguely aware that I was losing the battle as Mikasa continued to give me the sex talk. "Is Levi topping? Jesus, Eren, just make sure you're being safe. Use condoms, okay? Out of all the things I'm going to hear, I kept hearing Jean saying that you're gay and that Levi turned you gay and—."

Mikasa kept rambling, but I was looking at Levi who was laughing quietly to himself.

I decided that I was so going to kill that blonde Dora and his horse of a boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you got the Twilight reference, then I don't know if that's good news or bad news.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren goes to a party, Levi feels lonely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so we get a second chapter... interesting...  
> i'm kidding, this is just some porn.

_"Thank goodness, I thought you somehow forgot how a cellular phone functions and couldn't answer my call."_

I shook my head, a smile worming its way to my lips. "Hello to you, too, Levi. What's up?"

_"Don't what's up me, dick. When the fuck are you coming home?"_

I looked around and decided to slip into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. It muted the loud music from the party and I was able to speak without shouting. "Maybe a bit later. Are you waiting up for me?"

_"Maybe."_

I quirked an eyebrow at this, my smile growing bigger. "Oh? To what do I owe the pleasure of having you wait up for my humble self?"

 _"To my hormones."_ Levi's voice, despite the answer, sounded bored. _"They're rampaging."_

I chuckled. I sat down on the covered toilet bowl and answered, "Yeah, sure sounds like it."

_"I didn't even see you out. You just left."_

"You did," I reminded him. "You even said something about what I'm wearing."

_"What are you wearing?"_

I paused, my smile slipping back on place.  _Manipulative bastard_ , I thought, before answering, "That plaid shirt I got from Armin."

_"What, no pants?"_

I couldn't stop myself from rolling my eyes although the action would go unseen. "Yes, Levi, I would go to a party without pants on."

_"Wouldn't really put it past you."_

"Har-har. You're not very good at this, you know?"

 _"Good at what, Eren?"_ I wasn't sure if I was just imagining it but it sounded like Levi's voice dropped an octave.

I shook my head and cleared my throat. "Anyway, what are you wearing? Must be lonely, home alone and all that."

_"I'll live. Just that giant, oversized sweater Hanji got me for Christmas."_

"What, no pants?" I mimicked him from before, my grin back.

_"Maybe."_

I blinked. Was Levi actually being serious?

_"Still there?"_

"Yeah. Aren't you cold?" I mentally slapped myself for sounding lame and unsexy.

Not like I  _wanted_  to sound sexy.

_"Very cold, actually. Very lonely, too. Unlike you, who's having the time of his life."_

"I wouldn't really say that I'm having the time of my life here. To be honest, I could be doing better stuff."

_"Oh? Like what?"_

"Really… I was hoping you'd have some ideas, Levi."

I looked at the door. If he was going to do this, there was a chance that someone would want to use the bathroom and I'd have to hold them up. I contemplated moving, but then my worries flew out the window when I heard Levi's reply.

_"I've got plenty of ideas, Eren. Lots of them involving you and you minus the clothes."_

I found my free hand going down to play with the hem of my shirt. "Tell me more."

 _"I would love to take it slow, but we wouldn't be good on time_ ," Levi's voice spoke through the receiver and directly into my ear, making me shiver a bit. _"I would go straight ahead for your belt and take off those pants, which, by the way, make your ass look really nice."_

I didn't have half the mind to thank Levi for the compliment, too busy trying to remove said belt using only one hand. I grunted into the receiver, earning a chuckle from Levi. Before I got the belt off, Levi was speaking again.

" _I'd go down on my knees and take your cock in my mouth, Eren. It's hard for me, right_?  _Hard, and hot, in my mouth and under my tongue._ "

 _Fuck_ , I almost spoke out. I traced a finger over my clothed member, eliciting a shiver from myself, and hissed into the receiver. "Levi…"

_"Is it hard for me, Eren? Does your body want me?"_

"Yes, yes. Levi, please," I whispered, my hand working its way into palming my straining length. I heard Levi chuckle and another shiver ran down my spine.

_"Please what, hmm? Please, let you fuck me? Do you want to, Eren? Do you want to break me apart?"_

"Can I?" I questioned back, not really knowing why I did. It just felt like the right thing to do, and I was rewarded for it with another breathy chuckle.

_"You can, Eren. You can spread me apart and I would take you all in. Matter of fact, I want you to do it to me."_

I finally allowed myself the contact of skin on skin, taking hold of my swollen dick and giving it slow pumps. I didn't know if someone was banging on the door or if that was just the music, nor did I care.

 _"I want you to pull me up by the hair when I'm done sucking you off, and then you can have your way with me. Make it rough, please."_ The way the word _please_ rolled off Levi's tongue had me quickening my pace. _"Take me raw, fuck me senseless. I need it."_

I let myself moan into the phone, letting Levi hear what he was doing to me. "I need you, Levi. Fuck, I need you."

_"Then come for me, Eren. Imagine that my mouth's waiting for your load. Come for me, love."_

So with a few more pumps, I followed his order. I came, shooting my spunk all over the floor, Levi's name leaving my lips. "Jesus Christ."  _Jesus Christ isn't his name, no_.

_"Leave that shitty place and come home. Now."_

Before I could reply, Levi had already hung up on me, leaving me sighing and tugging on my hair strands. I cleaned up my mess then promptly left the bathroom, surprised that there was no line queuing outside the door. Relieved, I began to sneak my way out, not really thinking about alerting Jean that I was leaving his –shitty– party already.

Just as I stepped out the front door, my phone buzzed in my pocket, alerting me of a text message. I groaned when I read it, almost sprinting to get to my car.

**Message from Levi:**

_"If you want any of that shit I told you to happen, you should get your ass back here in 10 minutes."_

* * *

_"Really, Jaeger?"_ Jean's voice greeted me first thing in the morning, and I was tempted to hurl my phone across the room. _"Some friend you are."_

"What the fuck are you even saying, fucking horse-face?"

_"Is your newly found sex life really more important than your friends?"_

"Goddamn, Kirschtein. You're not making any sense."

Jean was about to say something but then I heard some movement and then Armin was speaking. _"Sorry, Eren. I kind of heard you in the bathroom and I may have slipped it out to him."_

In the background, I heard Jean shout, _"Yeah, go leave your friends just because you get some booty call. Congrats, you asshole! You're finally getting laid. No need for friends now."_ As his speech reached the end, Jean's voice grew louder until I was sure that he was pulling the phone away from Armin.

 _"Sorry about that,"_ Armin said, sounding sheepish.

"No, you know what? Fuck you all. I need a vacation from life, thanks, bye, I love you but fuck you, dora."

I hung up and tossed the phone aside, smothering my groan into my pillow. I heard the door open and Levi walked in, flopping down beside me and leaning in to whisper in my ear, "Still sore, love?"

"And fuck you, too," I replied, too pissed off to face him.

"I know you want to. Too bad, you were two minutes and eleven seconds late."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just suddenly got the urge to try and write phone sex for these two because idk, don't judge me (sorry, it's shitty phone sex). also, will probably put up another chapter (without porn because otherwise this will totally turn into a sexcapades fic) so uh yeah thanks


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The couple adopts a cat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 150 kudos wow um i feel like i'm undeserving but thanks y'all you make my heart go doki doki   
> also i was thinking of making them have thanksgiving sex but nah so no smut in this chapter

When Levi walked in our apartment, cradling a cat in his arms, I almost choked on my pizza.

"Is it dead?" I asked, eyeing the animal.

"What an optimistic bundle of joy you are. Why would I bring home a dead cat?"

"I don't know, maybe for some sort of sick offering to Satan?" I spoke through a mouthful of Hawaiian, earning a disgusted sneer from Levi.

"I will offer your half-dead body to Satan if you don't shut up," he said in his usual deadpan.

Levi placed the cat down on my lap. "Watch it for a second." He then left for the kitchen.

I realized that the cat was indeed alive when it peered up at me, and there was something familiar about the cat that had me petting it. It was rather friendly, leaning into my hand, demanding that I scratch behind the ear.

Levi returned with a small bowl, an old one that was rarely used, and set it down by my feet. The cat bounded down and started lapping at the milk.

"Well?" I started, giving Levi an expectant look.

"Well what, brat?" he asked.

"Care to explain?"

The raven-haired man plopped down beside me on the couch, helping himself to a slice of pizza. "There's not much to explain. He's a frequent visitor at the shop," he said, nodding to the black and white tabby cat. "I've been feeding him for a few weeks, so I thought I might as well bring him home. He's clean and likes baths, knows how to shit in a shitbox and all that."

"Really? Sounds pretty tamed to me. Maybe he has an owner already?"

"Probably. Well, if they ever come looking for him, they can have him back. But for now, he can stay with us," Levi murmured, and added, "Unless you have a problem with that."

I noted that he didn't seem like he wanted the cat gone any time soon, and I felt my lips pull up into a smile.

"The only problem I have is when we're having some smexy time and he peeks in."

"Fuck you."

"Yes, please."

I received an eye roll which I laughed off, reaching down to pat the cat again. It finished the milk and jumped up, sitting between us.

"So what are you naming it?" I asked Levi, in between munching on my third slice of pizza.

Levi, again, gave me a disgusted look, but didn't comment on my lack of table –couch– manners. "Do you have any suggestions?"

"Sorry, I'm not good at naming."

"Ren."

I gave him a look, my eyebrows raised, and then turned my attention to the cat,  _Ren_ , again. It was eyeing my pizza, and it took me a few seconds to piece together what was so familiar about it. It was almost sappy, really, on Levi's part.

Ren's eyes were a bright shade of green.

* * *

"Levi! Get him out of here!

Said man opened the door to the bathroom and I yelped, much to my embarrassment.

"Could you not wake up the whole neighborhood?"

"Could you tell Ren that watching people taking a bath is rude?" I countered, giving myself a pointed look before doing the same with him and the cat.

Levi picked up said cat, which was perched on the sink, directly in front of me, with a full view of my very naked bodice. "Don't worry, he doesn't enjoy the sight."

"Oh, I know someone who does."

Levi slammed the door close behind him.

* * *

Thanksgiving and, because of my persistence, Levi agreed that we could have some turkey on the table and some extra food for dinner. I was in the process of chopping down on some carrots for the stew when the bell rang.

"Who the fuck?" Levi eloquently called out, not really taking his attention off from the salad he was making. I shook my head, laughing at him.

"It's okay, I'll get it."

When I opened the door, I didn't expect to get tackled to the ground by a very enthusiastic Hanji, with Erwin in tow.

"Hanji, what the—," I was beginning to say, but Levi's disembodied voice cut me off.

" _Hanji_? What the fuck is she doing here?" He called out.

"Obviously to celebrate Thanksgiving, grumpy head. Also, I've got wine!" she called back, shouting way too near my ear for my comfort. I hugged her back a bit and then politely asked her to get the fuck off me.

 _Wow, I'm starting to sound like Levi_.

Erwin chuckled and only then did I notice that he let himself in, even closing the door behind him. He helped me up on my feet and then proceeded to wander off to the kitchen. I could barely hear him talking with Levi over Hanji's sudden squeal.

" _Oh my god is that a cat_?"

 _Oh my god I'm so sorry Ren_.

"Er, yeah. We're kind of taking care of him in the mean time," I told her. Ren started to paw its way towards me and I picked him up, holding him in my arms. Hanji practically swooned at him.

"In the mean time?"

"Yeah, it's pretty domesticated so we think it could have been someone's pet. He probably got lost or something, so we're keeping him here for now," I explained. Ren meowed, as if agreeing.

"Oh, I see. Where'd you find him anyway?" she asked, reaching out a tentative hand to pat Ren. He tilted his head, leaning into the touch, which made Hanji so excited she almost started jumping in place.

"Levi found him in the café, took him home."

"Levi did? Wow, you would never expect him to do something like that," she mused. She leaned in and touched noses with Ren. "Then again, with those eyes…" She looked up at me and gave me a kind smile.

I returned the smile and said, "Yeah, I noticed," in a softer voice. "Well, do you want to hold him?"

"Hell yeah!" She was taking him before I could reply.

"Just don't choke him or something—,"

"Who's your mama?" she started to demand from the cat, twirling on her feet while holding him out, and then bringing him to her chest. Ren didn't seem to mind but I was already starting to get worried.

"Hanji, I would appreciate it if you don't kill our cat, because Levi would kill me."

"Eren, he's such a cutie!" She squealed, hugging Ren again. "Oh my god, he smells good!"

Right on timing, Levi decided to walk in. "Eren, help me set the table." He looked over to where Hanji was assaulting Ren. "What the fuck, four eyes? You're suffocating him— _are you sniffing my cat_?"

"What brand of shampoo do you use on him? I wanna buy some for Sawny and Bean!" She asked him. Her glasses were hanging off her nose from pressing Ren to her face.

"Eren, please get that thing off Ren before the poor cat dies."

* * *

Food was made (thanks to Levi), the table was set (no thanks to Hanji), and the four of us were seated around the table, with Ren hanging around our feet.

"I guess we should say what we're thankful for first," I piped out. "Me first! I'm thankful for my family, although they're not here because Armin has shit to do and Mikasa's overseas—"

"We know that, brat—"

"—and I'm thankful for Levi, and thankful that he tolerates me," I finished, ignoring the impromptu interruption from said man.

He snorted. "I'm thankful for the café, because it brings in good money which I use to support my boyfriend's needy ass."

"Hey! I work there! And I'm not needy, Christ."

Hanji decided to butt in before we could continue our playful banter. "I'm thankful for my two dogs and my apartment, and the landlord for letting me have pets as big as them."

I saw Levi mouth a  _loser_  to Hanji and she responded by sticking out her tongue. "Oh, and for Moblit too, I guess. He's cute."

Erwin spoke up next. "I'm thankful for my friends and for the people who let me eat on their table for Thanksgiving. Thanks, you two."

"You sound like you're homeless," Levi said. "Okay, enough with the sap, I'm starving." So everyone dug in.

Hanji kept trying to feed Ren and Levi kept trying to kick her under the table, while me and Erwin laughed at them.

"Eren, pass me some mashed potatoes."

I took the bowl and passed it over then Levi scooped some up and dumped it into Ren's bowl.

Erwin cleared his throat. "So you finally got yourself a pussy."

Everyone seated around the table looked at Erwin as if he suddenly declared war against man-eating giants.

Without batting an eye, Levi replied, "You know I get some. Eren's such a pussy; I don't know why I even bothered with an actual cat."

Cue to me choking on my potato salad. "Hey!"

"Good one," Erwin praised Levi, and then I started making complaints but no one in the table seemed to be listening to me, so the rest of Thanksgiving dinner was spent with me quietly mock-sulking while eating.

* * *

Hanji and Erwin left after they promised to buy Ren a collar and a matching bowl as a joint gift, and then Levi whisked them off. We cleared the table, got the dishes done, and then we were tucking ourselves to bed inside his room.

"This is starting to feel small for us," he commented, referring to the bed.

"I think it's fine. Perfect for cuddling." I made my point clear by draping my arm on his waist. He flicked my forehead. I laughed and only snuggled closer.

I was starting to drift off when a buzzing sound erupted from the bedside table and startled me a bit.

Without looking up from the book he was reading, Levi asked, "Eren, love, can you grab my phone for me?"

I rolled over and plucked it up, handing it to him. He fumbled with it for a while, and then a small smirk pulled his lips upwards. "Look what the dorks got."

Hanji had sent a message, thanking us again for the dinner, and there was a photo attached of the collar and bowl they promised. It was cute, to say the least. It even got a "not bad" from Levi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i get a kick out of levi calling eren "love" fight me


End file.
